A few days ago, I did a post about laying down my superhero cape. The day that inspired said blog was one of many recent events that seem to be converging into one, steady message from the universe; “Slow the hell down, Rhenna. It’s time for you to re-write your rules.“
You’d think adjusting would be easy given many, blessedly positive forms of motivation:
- Special moments with my daughters (even with there’s homework involved).
- Time at the movies with the whole family fighting over who gets to hold the popcorn tub.
- Perfect fall weekends where we get a lot of stuff done together…and yet, my neck doesn’t feel so tense it could snap on a stiff wind.
Those are some pretty nice looking carrots, right?
So, why am I taking so long to adjust?
Because the mousetrap in my head has been the way it is for a mighty long time. No matter what I do, the wires seem to spring back into their originating position with a precision to make a mechanical engineer weep.
I keep coming up with an image in my mind of those thingys in the grocery and convenience stores that push produce and cans forward as soon as you pull the front object out. I’ve googled for the last ten minutes to try and find a good picture or a name, but damned if I can find one. You know what I mean…the pain-in-the-butt feature that, when you want to put something BACK, you have to push against the lever so you can wedge the product back in?
Yeah, I feel like I was born with one of those. One that’s constantly applying pressure and pushing me past the good stuff. And I really, really want to figure out how to disengage the damned thing so I can take life as I’m able instead of how fast it thinks I should go.
I’ve already started rearranging some aspects of my life. Friends, when you put things to them nicely, are usually supportive and encourage you to make your life better. Bigger things? Things have the potential to impact your paycheck? Yeah, those are tougher. Definitely more frightening. I can’t help but wonder, as I’m navigating career steps, if I’m exchaning a bed of coals for one made of needles.
Life choices aside, I think the biggest change I can make is re-wiring the mousetrap. Awarenss, I think, is the key. Setting in place positive behavior replacements for the ones I want to lose. Kinda like replacing cigarettes with suckers, but on a much less tangible basis.
A coworker recently used the expression, “Redifining what’s productive.”
Yeah, gnaw on that one for a bit.
Have you tackled any big life changes like this? Behaviors you can’t always clearly define but know you want to irradicate? What worked for you?